Life at your neighborhood gym is full of characters. Some of these people could star in their own TV show. They are equally annoying and humorous.
The purpose of working out is to build a healthier body. Not sure if everyone is on the same page. The other day I finish my workout and stop by McDonalds for a salad. Lo and behold as I enter the establishment I see several females from the gym chowing down on burgers and fries. That's like having open heart surgery and then eating a can of Crisco afterwards.
Or what about the people I see slavishly chugging on the eliptical, bike, or treadmill with a cup of sugar-infested Starbucks coffee next to them?
Next is Dancing Man. Equipped with his spandex pants, goggles, and an MP3 player with headphones he begins to do a cable cross over designed to work the chest. He starts to sway and gyrate, weaving a mesmirzing image that looks like a combination of mating peclicans and a rabid dog. Somewhere in my head I hear the Bee Gees' "Stayin' Alive". John Travolta would be proud of him. Everytime he did his "show" I noticed several people just stopping and watching in awe and amazement. I almost wanted to go over and tip him for entertaining me.
How about UFC Man. UFC Man looked like a 30-something male, 6 foot tall, weighing about 235 lbs. He is working his triceps on the cable machine, pushing down the bar. But in between sets he starts his shadow UFC or taebo routine. It is a combination of shadow boxing and kicks in the air, all the while weaving and bobbing his head as if someone is fighting him back. I think he believes he is training to fight Brock Lesnar in the next UFC pay-per-view. Good luck fella.
I always chuckle when I see Hyperactive Speedy Workout person. An HSW demonically goes through their set and reps so fast they seemed possessed from the devil. The ignore form in order to quickly pump out their sets. I half expect their head to spin around like Linda Blair in The Exorcist.
Last of all is The Screamer. This is usually a gym lifer, one that is there all the time and has a pretty good body. They like to scream when they work out. Bloodcurdling screams bounce off the walls and carry across the vast gym. Most of the time it is doing squats and they shriek (is it in agony or joy?) as they do their set. It's funny to see the uninitiated stop in their workouts to watch The Screamer.
So next time you are at the gym look for your favorite characters.
